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Free Will

To: tyagi@houseofkaos.abyss.com
From: Bill Heidrick 
Subject: Re: Free Will
Date: Mon, 11 Sep 1995 12:57:57 -0400

93 Don,

Donald M. Wallace  writes:

>Why, then, is it the perogative of any initiate to take the oath of the 
>Abyss? ... Either way, why do you say that, at some point, the Oath 
>becomes 'possible'?

Strictly speaking, there is neither prerogative nor taking of that Oath.
Below Exempt Adept, the oath cannot be accepted because the Ruach soul
is not complete.  When one attempts to understand everything as a
communication directly between oneself and the divine, there are three
levels of comprehension.  Any person can try the 1st.  Any initiate can
try the 2nd.  An Exempt Adept can try the 3rd.  As the world fades away
on the approach of death or in certain states of meditation, the self
can simplify and a little oath can be "taken" for a lesser crossing -- but
that's another matter.  Here is my theory of the three levels of the
oath:

1. The deity is always talking to you -- sub Tipheret attainment level,
   insanity via paranoia is common in consequence.
2. Acceptance of the immanence of the divine in all perceptions -- Tipheret
   level, appropriate state of mind to undertake the Knowledge and
   Conversation of the H.G.A.
3. Babe of the Abyss, just after the end of Chesed development -- no
   perception or mental construction may be granted interpretive or symbolic.
   significance.  Every perception and thought must be embraced without
   idolatry in the most unbounded sense -- effectively, this means you
   cannot allow yourself to interpret anything in terms of life experience,
   including infantile knowledge like "bright-hot = fire-afraid".  The
   Holy Guardian Angel goes away, your worldly and attained identities
   go away, everything.  In place of this, you must simply take every
   nuance to be direct communication with the deity, unexamined,
   unprejudiced and uninterpreted.  If this state passes critical
   approximation, the Abyss is crossed.  There are traditional details,
   some of which amount to approaches to the required state and helpful
   visualizations that make the transition easier.  E.g. "Who shall say
   'water, water' in that place shall fail" and "the figure in the
   white linen garment", "the voice speaking in the language of your
   childhood", "the throne", "the great sea", "the voice in the silence",
   Blake's universe filled with eyes like those of the peacocks tail (but
   seeing).

   The Exempt Adept can understand, not simply know as an idea, that
"oath".  At the instant of understanding, the oath is "taken" and the
venture commences.

>fruitful analogy might be that failure to renounce ones 
>ties of ones ego keeps the ship of ones Self moored to the dock when the 
>tide goes out?

Not bad, but I would say it's a little more like taking off in a speedboat
while the ego is still anchored with an unbreakable chain to an immovable
piling at the dock.  It's more messy unless you can cut loose the mooring
from the capsan of your vessel.  Once that thing gets seriously moving,
something has to go or the whole thing will break up.

93 93/93
Bill

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