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To: zazas-l@hollyfeld.org (ZAZAS-L Satanist Elist)
From: tyagi@houseofkaos.abyss.com (nocTifer)
Subject: (Z) Taboos and the Left-hand Path (LONG)
Date: Thu, 17 Sep 1998 03:56:51 -0700 (PDT)

49980712 aa3 Hail Satan!


TABOOS AND THE LEFT-HAND PATH 
_____________________________

taboos are predominantly a SOCIAL thing, and what I mean by 
social applies to the culture in which one is living OR has lived.  
if it was in the culture one has lived then the taboo is internalized.  
if it is in the culture in which one presently lives then the taboo 
is at least externalized but continually conditions the individual
to the taboo while she lives in that culture (eventually becoming
somewhat internalized regardless of the desires of the individual).

in effect, taboos are determined not by the most liberated
but by the most psychologically HAMSTRINGED who have any sort
of influence on one's psychosocial environment.

a perfect example is the wearing of skirts by men, which I
sometimes enjoy on account of facility and aesthetic..  my own 
social conditioning is counter to it.  my family and friends 
never did this.  I grew up in two different kinds of 
environments:

	a) upper-middle-class white suburb (Santa Clara)
	b) lower-middle-class mixed suburb (Milpitas)

in both cases gender apparel was very conservative outside
of events such as Rocky Horror Picture Show (which delved
into the very taboo I'm talking about) or comedy shows like
Monty Python's Flying Circus (which got alot of its charge
from engaging in strained ways the taboos of Euro-American
culture -- alot of comedy surrounds taboo behaviors/events).

while most women do not feel this taboo about wearing skirts
because of the gender prejudices, for a man to wear a skirt
challenges my culture's social convention.  if one surrounds
oneself with people who are repressed, then this charge
naturally invades one's life unless one is not concerned with
the reactions of others.  the taboos that others have
internally often have an external affect upon us.

that is, concern about the reactions of other people is a
prime factor in the internalization of taboo.  sure, the act
itself might not be charged (I can wear a skirt in the
privacy of my own home if I grew up wearing them and there
will be no charge), but wearing them in PUBLIC becomes the
charge.  for those raised like me for whom the very IDEA of 
such an act was forbidden (*I* might be homosexual ), 
even trying on a skirt at ALL is a taboo act.  

now one can decondition oneself to these types of taboos
surrounding harmless acts (societal prejudices) through
carefully constructing around oneself an aura and envelope
of taboo-breaking and practicing this routinely.  the aura 
is a personal empowerment within which one is deconditioned
and this quality of deconditioning carries through times
where one is conforming to societal expectation.  this can
be done in the privacy of one's own home and in personal
rituals wherein taboos are engaged.  

the envelope is a personal reputation for and momentum 
revolving around the challenging and breakage of societal 
taboo.  I have achieved this in my situation in San Jose.  
I am known for doing 'crazy' things, stuff that is basically 
harmless, but for which the reaction is at times "don't you 
get alot of shit for doing that from conservative people?"

I call it the 'weirdness factor', and it is absolutely a
of power of extension of options by virtue of exercising
freedoms.  this is one of the truly sad things about our
education in the 'Land of Freedom' -- that we are not in
the course of our political education informed that if we
do not EXERCISE our freedoms then we shall lose them: first
by virtue of habit and societal judgement, secondarily
as the society becomes more conservative and begins to
legislate these freedoms out of behavioral possibility
without the threat of repercussion.  this obtains 
especially in the realm of religious freedoms and things
like sexuality and psychoactives.

personal appearance and behavior are the front line of
this set of taboos, and teenagers (who are attempting to
shrug off their parental and societal conditioning in
an act of maturative initiation) are those who are most
likely to manifest it.  I call this 'adolescence', and it
can be engaged and maintained by the diligent for all of
one's life (I have proved it for many years).

empowerment and liberty come from increasing the RANGE of
our options.  if I limit myself on account of my preferred
politics then this is not any different from another's limiting
themself to their preferred religious upbringing.  to 
refrain from the use of make-up, as a woman, on account of 
the political and psychological repercussions of the
predominant beauty standard has the same conditioning 
effect as for those who refrain on account of religious
conservatism.  eventually if maintained long enough and
if enough people around me engage the same ideology/behavior
then the taboo will become the OPPOSITE of this within
my experiential pool.  

however, the *liberated* individual (the ideal of Satanism)
has the option and ability to choose ANY option (that is,
to wear make-up well, refrain from wearing it, or something
in-between) and suffer neither internal NOR external
pressure on account of this.  neither will I have fears
about how I must be a 'hypocrite' or 'insane' nor will I
find people around me questioning me and telling me that
I should act differently (especially over time).

in dense urban centers the taboo complex sometimes breaks
down.  it is here that we find religious systems becoming
fragmented and dissolute, holding no power over the acts
of their constituents (the most liberal churches seem to
come from these urban centers).  suddenly we have people
from VERY different walks of life living side-by-side,
and people become inured to much BEHAVIORAL VARIETY.  

eventually the attitude changes about uniqueness.  it
is seen as a virtue.  doing things differently, quirkily,
intentionally, begins to demonstrate spunk, willpower, 
genius, a resistance to the dominating establishments of 
human culture.  the 'artist mentality' is therein revered.  

a person who gains a reputation as an artist or 'madwoman'
is allowed a great leeway of behavioral variation.  their
conditioning breaks down, they are able to act more from 
spontaneous inspiration.  in short, they return to aware 
human living.

the only way to preserve the envelope of taboo-breaking
is to live in it.  otherwise one's conformity to the
societal repression serves to condition oneself to the
same exact prejudices.  if I wear skirts all the time,
then people put me into the box of 'madman' or 
'crossdresser' or 'fag' or whatever.  as I do this
at whim I become associated with 'strange, probably
disturbed or insane' behavior.  suddenly I'm not held to
the same standards as others, having been let off for
social disability.  however, simultaneously I have cut
the teeth of those who have never experienced being in
the presence of a "crossdresser".  they experience the
approbation or allowance that this type of behavior is
not punished or repressed by the people with whom they
are sharing space.  it is "apparently ok for some people 
to do this kinda shit."

eventually it paves the way for the serious who like to
live in trans-gender clothes.  it provides for a breakdown 
of societal taboo and gender roles.  it serves to disrupt 
(at least in the case of seriously disguising fashions) the 
erotic energies that lead to the conception of children (by 
providing males with an urge to hit on anything that looks 
like it might be a 'girl' with a second thought -- "whoa, 
that girl looks somewhat masculine, I don't think I'll 
chance it").

when it comes to behaviors which are more controversial,
such as nudity or sexuality, ingestion of illegal and/or 
intoxicating substances, or engaging certain types of 
worship, the charge increases dramatically.  now "there 
is a place (not here) for such behavior" (e.g. masturbation)
or one is 'stupid' for doing them (e.g. smoking pot or
worshipping Lucifer).  

not only is there social restriction on the conditions in 
which some behaviors are allowed (like sex, which "should be 
done privately, away from children and other impressionables 
and/or nonconsenting viewers"), but some acts are punished
for having been engaged at ALL (like sodomy in some areas,
or ingesting illegal substances).

these types of behaviors are more difficult to decondition
oneself about because there is a general support for their
inhibition in some circumstances and this gradually leaks into
private relationships and, inevitably, personal viewpoints.

for one generation sex might be allowed by any two people
of consent but only in private.  for the next sexuality may
be seen as something 'bad' to do that requires shame unless
there is some kind of license distributed by a social
organization (like a Marriage License).  for the next sex
may become so completely restrained that it must be done
only in order to procreate the species and as approved by
one's social authority.  for the next it should not be
performed at all except by licensed practitioners who are
only involved so as to continue the species (cf. Margaret
Atwood's beautifully written _A Handmaid's Tale_).

that is, societal taboos are CUMULATIVE, and those who
participate in conforming to them in any context also, if
unintentionally, contribute to establishing them as the
norm and ingrain them as creeping inhibitions which will
inevitably solidify into legal restraint.

for this reason those who wish to decondition ourselves
and allow ourselves the greatest actual freedoms of behavior 
practice Left-handed (Vamamarg) Tantra or ritualized and 
intentional taboo-breaking.  those taboos which are the most 
strongly constrained (in my culture things like nudity, 
masturbation, ingestion of psychoactives, practice of heretical 
types of religion, etc.) are integrated into a private and 
ritualized indulgence which affirms to myself the beauty and 
excellence of this choice of behavior.  

those who are masters of this path begin to decondition the
people who live around them through exercising their options.  
integrating varieties in the form and content of speech, 
appearance and action at least instills a taboo-breaking aura
around the master ("don't worry about her, she's just crazy,
but she's a great person, you'll get used to her").  

to the master the choice of behavior becomes intuitional if 
not sometimes reactionary (opposing oppressive psychosocial 
energies) and invisible to hir.  to those whom she meets hir 
appearance and behavior is transformational on many levels 
and serves to liberate at a certain level of consciousness 
all whom with she may come into contact.

this is especially true of those who are able to achieve 
confidence and an expertise at putting people at ease despite 
awkward interactions.  they are seen as 'lucky' and that they
'can get away with anything' because their aura carries them
through the social conditioning like a fish swimming upstream.
I've have had people express their envy for being so 'lucky',
and I feel that this was at least in part a misperception of
the dynamics involved and my courage.

one of the potential problems of ORGANIZED taboo-breaking is
that it sets up a counter-current in behavioral conditioning.
suddenly there is an eddy in the stream.  now in the confines
of the subculture there exists a pressure to conform to the
taboo-breaking activity and NOT abiding becomes a taboo.  for
this reason masters are typically found in isolation or, in
the midst of a bunch of reactionaries doing conventional things
(reversing the reverse-trend; cf. Rashneesh's Rolls Royces).

those who continually break this limiting and nonharmful social
conditioning in themselves tend to be more aware of the world
and themselves, not put to sleep by the drone of the mob,
being attentive to the currents and intensity of the circum-
stance.  those who tend to get into fights about such taboo-
breaking are not usually the masters of the Vamamarg, but instead
those who have yet to understand the line that can be walked 
without the perception of violation.  they will also have taken 
up at least a moderate study of nonviolent conflict resolution 
or be prepared for possible outrage.  such masters are typically
more capable of compassion and sensitive to the needs of beings
other than themselves, inclusive of those of other species.
sometimes mystical paths incorporate elements of this liberating 
ideology and practice.


I would like to make it clear that I have no formal connection
to any traditional system of tantra, be that what is called
the Vamamarg or otherwise.  what I have learned I have done so
from the goddess I know as Kali and in my own experimentation,
being a natural tantric who has undertaken what I understand
to be a monastic (dedicated, intuitively-directed alternatively
indulgent and ascetic) path that includes the kinds of 
activities described above.  

I would also note that I am not well-studied in the classic
psychological or spiritual evaluations of the nature of taboo,
having largely cobbled together my ideas from my experience
in reflection often initiated by my kindred who ask insightful
and challenging questions.  

blessed beast!
______________________________________________________________________
nocTifer: tyagi@houseofkaos.abyss.com  ---  http://www.abyss.com/tokus
TOKUS-COE: 408/2-666-SLUG --- Emergency Contraception:18005849911
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