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[from http://www.oakgrove.org/GreenPages/bos/3265.txt ] 1431 Subject: XXXI Hymns Fr. Achad (Charles Stansfield Jones) Key entry by Fr. Nachash Urus-Hadit Camp, OTO Completed 11-21-90 e.v. **************************************************************** ****** XXXI HYMNS TO THE STAR GODDESS Who is Not BY XIII: which is ACHAD I .ù. Invocation Mother of the Sun, Whose Body is White with the Milk of the Stars, bend upon Thy servant and impart unto him Thy Secret Kiss! Enkindle within him the Holy Ecstasy Thou hast promised unto them that love Thee; the Ecstasy which redeemeth from all pain. 1432 Hast thou not proclaimed: All the sorrows are but shadows, they pass and are done, but there is that which remains? Tha t the Universe is Pure Joy-that Thou givest unimaginable Joy s on Earth--that Thou demandest naught in sacrifice? Let me then rejoice, for therein may I serve Thee most fully . Let it be Thy Joy to see my joy; even as Thou hast promised in Th y Holy Book! Now, therefore, am I Joyful in Thy Love. AUMN II .ù. The Brook I wandered beside the running stream, and mine eyes caught the glint of Thy Starry Orbs in the swirling waters. So is it with my mind; it flows on towards the Grea t Sea of Understanding wherein I may come to know Thee more fully. Sometimes, as it journeys, it threatens to overflow its ba nks in its eagerness to reflect a wider image of Thine Infinite Body. Ah! How the very stones, over which flow the life of my being, thrill at the tender caress of Thy reflected Image. 1433 Thou, too, art Matter; it is I---Thy Complement---wh o am motion! Therefore these very stones are of Thee, but the Spirit ---the Life---is the very Self of me; mine Inmost Being. Flow on, O Stream! Flow on, O Life! Towards the Grea t Sea of Understanding, the Great Mother. III .ù. The Rose Garden Long have I lain and waited for Thee in the Rose Garden of Life; yet ever Thou withholdest Thyself from mine Understanding. As I lay I contemplated Thy nature as that of an Infinite Rose. Petals, petals, petals.. but where, O Beauteous One, is Thy Hea rt? Hast Thou no Heart? Are Thy petals Infinite so that I may never reach the Core of Thy Being? Yet, Thou hast said: "I love you! I yearn to you! P ale or purple, veiled or voluptuous, I who am all pleasure and purpl e, and drunkeness of the innermost sense, desire you: Come unto me!" Yea! Mine innermost sense is drunken; it is intoxicated upon t he Dew of the Rose. Thy Heart is my Heart; there is no difference, O Be loved. When I shall have penetrated to the Heart of Thine Infinite Rose, there shall I find Myself. But I shall never come to myself---only to Thee. 1434 IV .ù. The Fox Glove Tall and straight as a Fox Glove do I stand before Thee, Mother of Heaven. The flower of my being is given over to a strange conceit; I grow up towards the Stars and not towards the Sun. Art Thou not Mother of the Sun? Thus have I blasphemed the Lord and Giver of Life for Thy sak e. Yet am I not ashamed, for in forgetting the Sun I am becom e the Sun--Thy Son--yet a thousand times more Thy Lover. The foxes have holes and the birds of the air have nests, bu t now I have nowhere to lay my head; for tall and straight as a Fox Glove do I stand before Thee. My resting place is the Womb of the Star s. Yet all that I may comprehend of Thine Infinite Body is b ut as the Glove upon one of Thy soft sweet hands, touching the Eart h, not hurting the little flowers. 1435 V .ù. The Storm A Dark Night and the Storm. The lightening flashes between Th ee and me. I am dazzled so that I see Thee not. So in the depths of my being flash the fires of life; they blind me to the Understanding of Thee and Thine Infinite Body of Stars . Yet I see Thee reflected in the body of her I love, as w e lie with quivering limbs awaiting the coming of the sound of thunder . She fears the thunder, and turns within herself for consolation . But even there the Lightning flameth, for I have loosed the fi res of my being within the dark recess---in honour of the Storm an d of Thine Infinite Body which I see not. VI .ù. The Hole in The Roof Once I knew an ancient serpent. He delighted to bask in the Sunshine which penetrated through a tiny hole in the roof of the cave. He was old and very wise. He said: "Upon me is concentrated the Light of the whole Univ- erse." 1436 But a little brown beetle, who had long lived in the cav e with him, looked up, and spreading his wings passed out throu gh the hole in roof---into the Infinite Beyond. Thus, forsaking wisdom, would I come to Thee, Beloved Lad y of the Starry Heavens. VII .ù. The Design Strange curves: and every Curve a Number woven into a M usical and Harmonious Pattern. Such was the design showed me by my friend when first we met. It was like an exchange of greetings by means of an inward recog- nition. Oh! Could I but grasp the Ever-changing Design of Th y Star Body, Mother of Heaven! Yet, it is written: "Every man and every woman is a star. Every number is infinite, there is no difference." Such then is Life, for those who love Thee: Strange Curve s, and every Curve a Number woven into a Musical and Harmonious Design. 1437 VIII .ù. The Snow Drift My body was blue as Thine, O Beloved, when they found me. I was stiff as if held in a close embrace. Nor was I conscious of aught but Thee, till the small fires of Earth brought me back with an agony of tingling pain. How came I to be lost in the snow-drift? I remember how I had taken shelter from the blinding storm. The snow fell about me, and I waited, turning my thought to Thee. Then did I realize how every snow-flake is built as a tiny star. I looked closer, burying my face in the white pile, as in Thy Bosom. Mine arms embraced the snow-drift; I clung to it in a mad ecstacy. Thus would I have pressed Thy Body to mine, wert Thou not In finite and I but as tiny as a star-flake. So was my body frozen---as by the utmost cold of inter-stellar space. It was blue as Thine when they found me locked in Thine embrace . 1438 IX .ù. Daylight In the Daylight I see not Thy Body of Stars, O Beloved. The little light of the Sun veils the Great Light of the Stars, for to-day Thou seemest distant. The Sun burns like a great Torch, and Earth seems as one of His little Spheres, filled with life. I am but a tiny spermatozoon, but within me is the fie ry and concentrated essence of Life. Draw me up into Thyself, O Sun! Project me into the Body of Our Lady Nuit! Thus shall a new Star be born, and I shall see Thee e ven in the Daylight, O Beloved. 1439 X .ù. The Bird Once I bought a little bird; his cage was very small; it ha d only one perch. He was so young he had not even learned to sing, but he chirped gladly when I brought him home. Then I raised the bars of his cage, and without a moment's hesit- ation he flew out into the room, and spying the cage o f the love-birds, perched upon it and examined it carefully. Not long afterwards another and stronger cage was obtained for the love-birds, for they had pecked through some of the frail bars. When the little bird was offered the discarded cage, he q uickly hopped from his tiny one to theirs. Now he has three perches and room for his tail, and when we open the door of his cage he refuses to come out. Perhaps he fears t o lose what he had once coveted and then obtained. Herein lies the secret of Government. Give the people wha t will make them reasonably comfortable; let them have three perch es and room for their tails; and forgetting their slavery and restric tions, they will be content. Hast Thou not said "The slaves shall serve." Lady of the Starry Heaven? 1440 XI .ù. The Moral There is another moral to the story of the little bird. Having gained his desire for a larger cage, he forgot his longing for Free- dom. The door remained open; the room was before him, where in he could stretch his wings and fly. Yet he preferred his cage. The wide world might have been his had he known how to use i t, but he was not ready for that; he would have perished of cold had I let him out into the wintry snow. Let those who would travel the Mystic Path remember this: Earth Consciousness is an illusion and limitation. When it fre ts us, like a little cage, our chance for greater freedom comes. But when a larger cage is offered---when we obtain Dhyana--- let us not rest there thinking ourselves free. The door is open, S amadhi lies beyond, and beyond that, when we are ready for it, th e Real Freedom, Nirvana. O Lady of the Stars, let me not content till I penetra te the ultimate bars and am Free---One with the Infinitely Great as wi th the Infinitely Small. 1441 XII .ù. The Invisible Foot Prints Long have I roamed the Earth delighting in the Good, the Bea utiful and the True; ever seeking the spots where these seem to b e most Perfect. There is joy in this wandering among the flowers of life, but Thy Joy, O Beloved, is to be desired above all. Now I seek a resting place, I am set upon a new Quest, to W orship at Thy feet. For it is written of Thee: "Bending down, a lambent fla me of blue, all touching, all penetrant, her lovely hands upon the black earth, and her lithe body arched for love, and her soft feet not hurting the little flowers." Oh! That I might discover Thine Invisible Footprints upon the Earth and there come to the Understanding of Thy Being, O Beloved. 1442 XIII .ù. The Finger Tips Or, it may be, O Beloved, I shall discover the imprints o f Thy finger tips amid the flowers or upon the Black Earth. Hath not Nemo a Garden that he tendeth? Doth he not also lab our in the Black Earth? Who knoweth when Thy hands may grasp me and draw me up into Thine arms, there to nestle at Thy breast, to feed upon the Milk of the Stars? Beloved, verily this tending of the Garden of the World---al though the labor may seem heavy---leadeth to a Great Reward. As Thou hast said: "Certainty, not faith, while in life upon death, rest, ecstasy." Nor dost Thou demand aught in sacrifice. What do the Bhaktis know of Love? They see the Beloved everywhe re. But when I am one with Thee, O Beloved, I shall not see Thee , for I shall know Theee as Thou art. 1443 XIV .ù. The Well of Stars I know a hidden well of clearest water. Naught but the coping of delicate pink onyx is visible until the secret spring be touc hed. Then beware! For above the entrance hangs a fiery sword. Few find this Well or know its Secret; there are but two roads leading thereto. From the broad Mountain summit we may search the slopes for a vision of the Woodland Delta where grow the Trees of Eternity, or we may journey through the Valley between the Ivory Hills---if we fe ar not the purple shadows and the black pit-fall. From Thee we came; to Thee may we return, O Well of Living Star s! XV .ù. The Icicles of Isis It hath been written how the Old King dreamed of his ba nished peacock, entombed in a palace of ice, who cried: "The Icicle s of Isis are falling on my head." Thus it is with those who arebanished to the Palace of the Mo on---- for the Word of Sin is Restriction. Oh! Lady of the Starry Heavens, let me not become frozen at the touch of the cold Veil of Isis. For the Moon is but the dead ref lector of the Sun, and He but the youngest of Thy Children of Light. 1444 Let me lift Thy Peacock Veil of a Million Starry Eyes, O Belove d! Show Thy Star Splendour, O Nuit; bid me within Thine house to d well! XVI .ù. Purple Mill The delicate purple mist streams up from the hills: I watc h and wait for the meaning of it all. Sometimes it seems like the incense smoke of Aspiration a scend- ing towards the Sun---giver of Light, Life, Love and L iberty to the Children of Earth. But the Sun is going down behind the Mountains, and Thy Starry Lamps glow in the Sky. Is not the Lamp above the Altar a symbol of the Desire of the Higher to draw up the lower to Itself? So, O Lady of Heaven, I liken the Mist to the life-breath of Souls who pant for Thee here below. And I remember Thy words: Above, the gemmed azure is The naked splendour of Nuit; She bends in ecstacy to kiss The secret ardours of Hadit. The winged globe, the starry blue, Are mine, O Ankh-af-na-khonsu! 1445 I, too, would ascend as a delicate purple mist that steams u p from the Hills. Art Thou not all Pleasure and Purple? XVII .ù. The Infinite Within I would that I were as the feminine counterpart of The e, O Beloved; then would I draw the Infinite within. Yet since Thy Pure Being must ever be more refined than thi s body of mine I should interpenetrate every part of Thee with my living flesh. Thus, O Beloved, should we enter into a new and more co mplete embrace: not as of earth wherein the male uniteth with the fem ale by means of the physical organs of love, but with every atom of my being close pressed to every atom of Thine---within and without. Then, O beloved, would I cry unto the Lord of the Primum Mobile to teach me the Art of the Whirling Motion of Eternity. Thus, whirling within Thee, our never-ending nuptial feast shall be celebrated, and a new System of Revolving Orbs be brought to birth. Ah! the shrill cry of Ecstacy of that Refined Rapture---the Orgasm of the Infinite Within. 1446 XVIII .ù. The Rainbow As I sat in the shelter of the forest glade, my eye caug ht the multi-coloured gleam of diamonds. I looked again; the Sun ray s were playing upon the dew which clung to a little curved twig. It seemed like a tiny rainbow of promise. Then, while I watched in wonder, a small grey spider bridg ed the arch of the bow with his silken thread. Ah! My Beloved, thus, too, hath the Spider of Destiny wove n his silken rope from extreme to extreme of the Great Rainbow of Prom ise. Fate hath fitted me as an Arrow to the String of Destiny in t he bow of the Sun. But Whose Hand shall draw that Mighty Bow, O Beloved, and s end me upon fleet wings to my resting place within Thine Heart? 1447 XIX .ù. Dropped Dew As I came from tending the Rose Garden and was about to ret urn to my humble shelter, my eyes caught the gleam of dropped dew l ike a tiny trail along the path. It was very early; the Sun had not yet re-arisen; the Stars still twinkled faintly in the sky. Who could have come before me to the Garden? I followed the trail of dew, stooping down so that I saw in each crystal drop the reflection of a tiny star. Thus came I to my lady's chamber; she it was who carrying roses had left this silvery thread as a clue to her hiding place. When I found her, her eyes were closed, as she pressed the fr agrant the pink blossoms to her white breast. Then did I bury my face in the blossoms and I saw not her eyes when she opened them in wonder. Thus, too, would I follow the Star-trail of Dropped Dew , ere the re-arisen Sun hides Thee from me, O My Beloved! Thus would I come to Thee and bury my face in Thy Breast am id the Roses of Heaven. 1448 Nor should I dare to look into Thine eyes, having disc overed Thy secret---the Dew of Love---the Elixir of Life. XX .ù. Twilight Twilight... and in a few brief moments the Stars will begin to peep. I will await Thee, here amid the heather, O Beloved. I wait... no stars appear for a mist has stolen up from the f oot of the mountains. Thus I waited for a sight of Thy Star Body till the cold damp mist of suppresed emotion chilled my being and my reason returned. The woman stood girt with a sword before me. Emotion was ov ercome by clarity of perception. Then did I remember Thy words: "The Khabs is in the Khu not the Khu in the Khabs. Worship then the Kha bs and behold my light shed over ye." Thus turned I my thoughts within, so that I became concen trated upon the Khabs---the Star of mine inmost being. Then did Thy Light arise as a halo of rapture, and I came a little to lie in Thy bo som. But I offered one particle of dust---and I lost all in that hou r. Such is the Mystery of Her who demandest naught in sacrifice. The twilight is returned. 1449 XXI .ù. The Dog Star Wisdom hath said: "Be not animal; refine thy rapture! The canst thou bear more joy!" I have been like an unleashed hound before Thee, O Belove d. I have striven towards Thee and Thou seest in me only the Dog Star . Yet will I not fall into the Pit called Because, there to perish with the dogs of reason. There is no reason in me; I seek Under- standing, O Mother of Heaven. Thus, with my face buried in the black earth, do I turn m y back upon Thee. I will refine my rapture. So Thou mayest behold me as I am, and so Thou shalt Underst and at last, O Beloved; for in reverse Thou readest this DOG aright. Hast Thou not said: "There is none other?" 1450 XXII .ù. Pot-pouri The roses are falling. This is the night of the full moon w hereon the children of Sin attend the Sacred Circle. Therein they will sit divided---but not for love's sake---for they know Thee not---O Beloved. Into the Elements, the fier y, the watery, the airy and the earthly Signs are they divided whe n they gather at the Full Moon within the forest. I wandered down the deep shadowy glade, there I espied a tiny sachet of pot-pouri, dropped---maybe---from the streaming gir dle of one of the maidens. Tenderly I raised it. Its perfume is like unto the perfume ofher I love. She, too, perhaps, has heard the call of the moon and is even now on her way to the secret tryst. But hast Thou not said: "Let there be no difference made among you between any one thing and any other thing; for thereby cometh hurt." What matter then the name of the maiden? What matt er the flowers of which it is composed? Yet dare I not burn this incense unto Thee, O Beloved, beca use of Thine hair, the Trees of Eternity. Oh! Little sachet of pot-pouri, thou hast reminded me of her I love, for the roses are falling, it is the night of the Ful l Moon and the children of Sin gather to attend the Sacred Circle. 1451 XXIII .ù. Red Swansdown It hath been told how Parzival shot and brought down th e Swan of Ecstacy as it winged over the Mountain of the Grail. But there is within the archives another story, unheard by th e ears of men. From the breast of the Eternal Swan floated one downy fe ather, steeped in blood. This did the youngest and least worthy of the Knights hide tenderly in his bosom till he concealed it with in the hard pillow of his lonely couch. Night after night that holy pillow became softer; sweeter and sweeter were his dreams. And one night---the night of the crowning of Parzival---he was granted the Great Vision w herein the Stars became like flecks of Swansdown upon the Bre ast of Heaven, each living and throbbing, for they were steeped in Bl ood. Then did every atom of his being become a Star racing jo yfully through the Great Body of the Lady of Heaven. Thus in sweet sleep came he into the Great Beyond. Grant unto me Thy Pillow of Blood and Ecstacy, O Beloved! 1452 XXIV .ù. Passing Clouds A dark night: Not a star is visible, but presently the moon shines out through a rift in the clouds. And I remember, "The s orrows are but shadows, they pass and are done, but there is that which remains." Yet is the moon but illusion. A dull day: but presently the Sunis seen as the clouds are dis pelled by His light. Is He that which remains? Night once more: the Sun is lost to sight, only the moon remi nds me of His presence. The clouds scud swiftly across the Sky and disa ppear. Thy Star Body is visible, O Beloved; all the sorrows and s hadows have passed and there is that which remains. When clouds gather, let me never forget Thee, O Beloved! 1453 XXV .ù. The Coiled Serpent Thus have I heard: The ostrich goeth swiftly; with ease could he outstrip those who covet his tail-feathers, yet when danger cometh he buriet h his head in the sand. Thetortoise moveth slowly and when embarrased he stoppeth, wi thdra- wing into his own shell; yet he passeth the hare. The hare sleepeth when he should be swiftly moving; he runn eth in his dreams thinking himself at the goal. But the Coiled Serpent hath wisdom, for he hideth his tail and it is not coveted; he raiseth his head and fears not; he moveth slowly like the tortoise, yet withdraweth not; he nestles close to the hare, darting his tongue with swiftness, yet falleth not asleep by the wayside. Would that I had the Wisdom of the Coiled Serpent, O Belove d, for Thou hast said: "Put on the wings, arouse the coiled spl endour within you: come unto me!" 1454 XXVI .ù. Love and Unity Twenty-six is the numeration of the Inneffable Name, but It con- cealeth Love and Unity. The Four-lettered Name implieth Law, yet it may be divid ed for love's sake; for Love is the law. The Four-lettered Name is that of the elements, but it may be divided for the chance of Union; for there is Unity therein. There is but One Substance and One Love and while these be twen- ty-six they One through thirteen which is but a half thereof. Thus do I play with numbers who would rather play with One an d that One Love. For Thou hast said: "There is naught that can unite the d ivided but love!" And is not Achad Ahebah? 1455 XXVII .ù. The Riddle What is that which cometh to a point yet goeth in a circle? This, O Beloved, is a dark saying, but Thou hast said: "My colour is black to the blind, but the blue and gold are seem of the s eeing. Also I have a secret glory for them that love me." And Hadit hath declared: "There is a veil; that veil is black." I would that I could tear aside the veil, O Beloved, for seein g Thee as Thou art, I might see Thee everywhere, even in the darknes s that cometh to a point yet goeth in a circle. For Hadit, the core of every star, says "It is I that go ," and Thou, Mother of the Stars, criest "To me! To me!" Resolve me the Riddle of Life, O Beloved, for loving Th ee I would behold Thy Secret Glory. 1456 XXVIII .ù. Sayings Isis hath said: "I am all that was and that is and that sha ll be, and no mortal hath lifted my veil." Who cares what is back of the moon? Jehovah showed his back unto Moses, saying: "No man hath s een my face at any time." Who cares to face the elements? Hadit hath said: "I am life and the giver of life; therefo re is the knowledge of me the knowledge of death." Who cares to know death? But Thou, O Beloved, hath said: "I give unimaginable joy s on earth, certainty, not faith, while in life upon death, peace unutterable, rest, ecstacy; nor do I demand aught in sacrifice." Who would not long to invoke Thee under Thy Stars, O Beloved? 1457 XXIX .ù. The Falling Star Falling, falling, falling! Thus fall the Rays from Thy Bo dy of Stars upon this tiny planet, O Beloved! Innumerable strea ms of Light like Star-rain upon the black earth. Since every man and every woman is a star, their lives ar e like unto streams of light concentrated upon every point in Space. As I lay with arms out-stretched, my bare body shining like ivory in the darkness. my scarlet abbai flung wide, mine eyes fixed upon the star-lit Heaven; I felt that I, too, was falling, fa lling, falling, in an ecstacy of fear and love into the void abyss of s pace. Then did I remember that Thou art continuous. Beneath, above, around me art Thou. And lo, from a falling star I became as a comet wh eeling in infinite Circles, each at a different angle, till my course traced out the Infinite Sphere that is the Symbol of Thee, O Beloved. Then did I aspire to find the Centre of All. And even now I am falling, falling, falling. 1458 XXX .ù. Justice I am a Fool, O Beloved, and therefore am I One or Nought a s the fancy takes me. Now am I come to Justice, so that I may be All or Naught acc ording to the direction of vision. No Breath may stir the Feather of Truth, therefore is Justice ALone in L. Yet the Ox-goad is Motion and Breath Matter if it be called the Ox which is also A. How foolish are these thoughts, which are but as the Sword i n the hand of Justice. They are as unbalanced as the Scales that sti r not, being fixed in the figure of Law above the Court House of a great City. But Thou hast said: "Love is the law, love under will." And Love is the Will to Change and Change is the Will to Love. Even in the stern outline of the Scales of Justice do I perceive the Instrument of Love, and in the Life Sentence , the Mystery of Imprisonment in Thy Being, O Beloved! 1459 XXXI .ù. Not Three Eternities are passed... I have outstripped a million St ars in my race across Thy Breast---The Milky Way. When shall I come to the Secret Centre of Thy Being? Time, thou thief, why dost thou rob the hungry babe? Space , thou hadst almost deceived me. O Lady Nuit, let me not confound the space-marks! Then, O Beloved, Thy Word came unto me, as it is wr itten: "All touching; All penetrant." Thus left I Time and Space and Circumstance, and every Star became as an atom in my Body, when it became Thy Body. Now never shall I be known, for it is I that go. But Thou, O Beloved, though Thou art infinitely Great, ar t Thou not energized by the Invisible Point---the Infinitely Small? A Million Eternities are Present, Deem not of Change; This is the Here and Now, and I am NOT -oOo-
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